Today, I had quite a day with the CF dudes, not forgetting the Mewahans attended and the extended help. It didn't go very well, but its was pretty satisfactory to all of us. But I just want to express my feelings and thoughts about someone who was or should I dare say, is still going through this camp with me?

He and I, we came back with an objective, a mission and a vision yet, along the way, I felt him slipping away. I struggled to push that thought to the back of my mind but today I just can't, the image of him just kept running across my mind. I'm so tempted to ask him what's going on but everytime I dial his number on the phone, I hesitate to go on because I don't think I'm prepared to hear whatever he has to say.

I miss him. Really. I do. I miss how fired up he used to be for CF and how he'd call me, D, and J just to catch up on how things are. Now.... I don't know where is he, how is he, what's going on in his life. It just feels as though, I do not know him anymore. Is this another phase of life where another person walks out on me? I don't know.

The news I had yesterday about grandpa, the problems that had been occuring with the CF lately, my exams and stuff like that........ I wish he cared. I never needed him to come all the way back to help me out physically or anything like that but rather, to be the listener he always had been for me when my parents got divorced or when I had a breakdown in other things. Was it something wrong that I have done? Well, even if I did, I guess I will never know.

I must admit that I am a disappointment to this brother of mine, for I am a failure. Along the way, I thought whatever I did was right and would bring us the outcome we both thought of. Now, my hands and feet are tied and bound to the grounds, I can do nothing no longer, and only surrender everything to God and fate and life and whatsoever. I feel abandoned in this event, I just needed him to care and not just care about the event but rather, care about me, and not be like the rest of them who pass me by......not realising how tired I am and not acknowledging me as a human being.

I want to call you..... but our friendship is so close yet so apart. I can only say I'm sorry, because I am a failure. And I don't know how long I can pull through these two weeks on my own now that you're not here......or er.....inconsistent... I just needed some support. But if I have disappointed you so badly then, I'm sorry, S. Maybe I shouldn't have been the one to share that vision after all.

I thought I would have a chance to know you,
But you contributed to my bitterness,
I only met you once,
And it wasn't very nice,
If I had came up to you,
The days when you were breathing,
Would that have made a change between us?

Somewhere deep inside me,
I hate you,
Because I deserved love from you,
But when I got the news,
Thinking I could fight back those tears,
Since there was no reason to cry,
I still felt that ache,
Even though we never started off right.

I begin to understand,
That all hurts and wrongs should never be kept,
When you're dead and gone,
The emptiness inside is far worse than the grudge,
I pray to God to help you,
No matter how much they hate you,
I still think you should've been saved.

As your body lowered down to six feet under,
You carry with you your past and regrets,
So is the two you owed your love and loyalty,
I played no role in it,
But I still wonder if there had been a chance of turning back,
If there'd be a chance,
To save your life.

I cried for you,
I had that scarce love for you,
You are still my family no matter what you did,
There is no point to list down your faults,
No one would care anymore,
You have paid all your debts in full,
The minute you breathe your last breath.

Wishing there had been another way to this,
I begin to wonder why you did so last time,
I wish I had a better way of knowing you,
And having a warmer closeness with you,
I know your departure must have been a torment,
Not forgetting your last few years of hell,
By the women you thought you deserved,
I can only feel sorry,
May you rest in peace...

I cried my heart out after the UPM performance, because it hurt so much as I watched the soloist take the stage. It wasn't fair. Looking back, how my mom hurt because I literally abandoned the family... how my music just fall apart one after another... how I lost myself, how I forgot everyone but only them. Never will I forget, my friends, teasing me ..."who's on the phone now? Jie guan? Darren? or Jonathan?....when will you have time for us?"

Though the term tease was used, it hurt me very much everytime it was mentioned. Coming back to CF was something so very beautiful and hopeful in the earlier chapters of it. I remembered the words Shaun and I shared, we're here to assist them. But look at me now, look at where I am, look at where I stand in the midst of them?

My life just seem to fall into pieces as the days go by. That night, it was my worst night. That look of disappointment from my teacher, was all it takes to break that last piece of my heart. All I ever wanted was to be loved, to love, and to make music. I gave my all for a bunch of wanderers, heart brokened, and faithless souls...

But the more I guide, the more I do the work, the more I cared, the more they left it to me, the more I taught, the more they refused to learn, the more I want to show them how I feel, they showed no sense of interest at all in how I feel. It was after all a one man show.

Darren once proposed...... not really once, more than once, to postpone the camp. But the fundamental fact that we all know, is that it will never happen at all if there's no one here anymore at that time....

I don't want any recognition. But I'm just so upset to see why they failed to see how much faith I have in them, how much love I have, how much I have done, and how much it takes to try.

That night I felt really stupid, as honourable as it sounded of being a person of selfless faith, I wished I was selfish after all. Because I'm just taken for granted every night every minute everyday. Nobody would care when its all been said and done, nobody would care what I have lost for their gains. Or if all else fails, what I have lost for their light effort in the importance of this.

I lost the closeness towards my family. I hated to see mom cry for such reasons. I hated to see my sister left alone when she needed me most. I hated to see my grandma not being able to have a quiet dinner with me because I'm so busy on the phone..

I lost my music. I hated to see myself quitting piano. I hated to see my vocal teacher upset with me. I hated myself for not having time to enjoy what I love.

I lost my church. I jump around for work..... where's my true self for God?

I lost my friends....

I lost my grip

I lost everything..................

Is it still worth it?

I don't know.

I just wish they would do something because everything I do is for them for the sake of God.
Where is their self will and the purpose of being a committee in this.

How many times do I have to be broken.....just for the sake of their revival, something not my own but theirs??

Or will it be true that they don't give a damn about God, about me........my family?

Don't say it's up to me...don't say I chose this path, because everything I did, I did it out of love, I gave every ounce of it to all of you, neglecting those loved ones I should be loving instead.

The many times I wanted to walk on them..... something holds me back. The strong desire to leave them is always taken away by something so strong within me, giving me unfailing hope and faith and patience for them.. but when will it happen?


I'm all out of love, because there is nothing left to be said. There is no hope anymore in me, I strive no more, you take control of how much you love Him. If you can't even do this, despite the fact He died for us, then........ I'm sorry.

This feeling she has,

The wounds she carried throughout childhood,

Flesh and blood covered the scars,

Her smile in disguise of her disappointments,

But as night falls,

She sleeps in fear,

In the night's cold without the most important warmth every child needs.



The one who brought her to the world,

The soul who connected hers before birth,

The embrace of seven months,

Interdependence of two lives in one body,

Leaving them both further more apart as the days come by,

Waking every morning with tear stained cheeks.



Her hollow laughter,

Her selfless heart,

The sweetness of her voice,

Tender fingers...

But a pair of slouching shoulders,

Marks the weight of the baggage she carry within her,

Through the days of her life.



The missing piece in the puzzle of her life,

Makes all the difference,

Relieves the chill down her spine,

Everytime she sees others who are joyful,

Holding hand in hand,

Loving so unconditionally,

But as for she,

She received nothing but a road so long a journey,

Where she walked with cuts and bruises,

Where she's left with no hope but only the desperateness,

To see the dim light of her life, come to an end.



I don't know how can I console her weak heart,

How to give her something I myself wished for,

But to only live in disappointments,

And to only dream of hope,

Having faith in a dead end,

Not knowing if that door of that important someone would be opened,

Not knowing if the reality of having shared the same heartbeat with meant something..



Does our breath mean anything to the one who breathed into us?

Our very first few steps,

Our rise and fall,

Nothing else nor anyone mattered as much in both of our lives,

As children,

As a wondering soul,

Wanting nothing but only that love.



Will you know how important you are,

How terrified we get looking through those dark cold eyes,

Not having that warmth from you,

Making me wish I never left your womb,

Because that was the only time you truly loved me,

Steady feet..... not wanting to break me.



I'm broken,

But still hoping,

Because I love you,

I want your love mom,

When will you love me,

Acknowledging me as a part of you...

Because I am nothing without you.

In the confrontation between the stream andthe rock, the stream always wins - notby strength but by perseverance." - H. Jackson Brown

Tonight's the UPM performance. Somehow I really don't want to go for it. It feels far worse than how I felt back when I played the piano for him in Glad Tiding's.

I don't seem to sing like how I would when I perform. Dolce seems to be a whole new meaning to me....... cos I make it sound so cruel. So much for sweetly....

I'm losing grip of my singing again. Mom called me last night, I told her I'm considering burning my vocal exam fees too. She said it's up to me. I know she's upset but I just don't know how else to go about it.

I need to find a way out of this. I'm drowning again...

I hate myself.

Well, I love Shaun!!!! weeeeeeee.... What a way of declaring my love for him. hahaha, shucks. Glad to see most of the things done lately. And D keeping his word for now about working his ass off. :)

My exams!!!! Well, I'm bucking up even more today. Not planning any outings. Just MGT MGT MGT MGT till I surrender myself. (p/s: MGT's Business Studies)

J's sick. Shucks, poor fella. Still calling me and coughing away and staying up. Need to give the bugger a slap to make sure he gets some rest. Mirroring my superwoman stunts is suicidal.

Yup, I walked out of my vocal class again. Well, I'm a person who don't waste any time. Since I don't remember the notes, I'm going home.

I sent my car to the car wash! Ten bucks. Foine, I'm too tired to wash so yea, lucky you people get business from me at 7.45am in the morning. hmph!!

I scolded Gracie yesterday night in public. She caused me a lot of trouble thanks to her absurd lifestyle of meeting up with men. She enjoys being a drama queen faking that she's in trouble and in a state of danger just to find her skimpily dressed and in an intimate position with a boy she's not met for a very long time. She made me drive out all the way and involving Kit Sing since it wasn't safe at such an hour at night, for stupid reasons. Enough is enough girl. Get a grip or get gone. I'm still considering whether I should expose her doings to her mom. I hate it when she uses my name saying I'm hanging out with her when I'm so not. It's unfair, the last time something happened, I got scolded by dad due to Uncle D's phone call complaining that I spend a lot of time with her outside with weird freaks.

I have a reputation, my integrity, not forgetting my dignity. I'm sooooooo at my breaking point with her. She's so vulnerable yet idiotic at times. I don't know what I can do to help her and at this point of time, I don't have the time, energy, effort, and money to do so. I need to aid those who appreciates help and progress from it first.

But I must express my gratitude to Kit Sing being willing to come out at such a short notice and so late at night. As we both know, that boy she met is no lousy "aqua", he ain't good, and it doesn't take a straight A student to notice that.

Well, I attended the UPM final rehearsal today at 7pm. Sad thing is, I seem to have lost my soul to sing for the choir this time. I mean, I knew it was gonna be hectic schedule at this time around but I took it up thinking mom would come watch. But now...... mom ain't coming.

J said he'd come. Promised me a month ago. Then last night he said he wants to go for choir farewell or something. Then D... sigh, he doesn't give me the answer like how he did for Glad Tidings anymore. Bro can't make it since he's moving to Johor soon. So it's just a performance for no purpose. And most ironically, the featured song would be Distant Land........ yeah, darn distant.

Disappointed? Damn right I am. But what can I do about it? I have no rights to force people to do what I want. I can't always have what I want.

I literally mimed my parts. I don't give a damn even if I know the songs. 'Cos I see no purpose anymore.

Ten things I like about you huh, Karen? No probs!!!!

1. You listen to my EVERY STORY. hahahahaha..... especially when I was crying over D and G previously. Thanks!!

2. You are a replica of me now!!! muahahaahah (evillish) We are twins of nutheads who laugh berserkly and insanely and GILA!

3. You teman me go poop in the toilet cos I'm scared. hehe *malu*

4. You force food down my throat despite my misison and vission to be aneroxic like Kate Moss. I still don't know why I don't eat by the way.....sigh

5. You make me sing !!!!!

6. You can't stop talking............ I try so hard to stop you but when you actually do, I'd like some noise. LOL!

7. You are soooo vain!! Just like me.

8. You are in love!! wakakakakkakaa........... I like it when you are. cos you're so....... restless. :P

9. You keep giving me reasons on boys who might like me. Awww.... you make me feel so wanted. wahahahahahaha

10. You are my roomie, through hardships and fun, we are great together. I quote : just the two of us, we can make it if we try~~~

"If you don’t have time to do it right, when will you have time to do it over?" - John Wooden

My room mate listed down TEN THINGS SHE LIKES ABOUT MAINE.

Please read it on http://oi-spattergroit.blogspot.com

Yes, I'm so vain at this point, but quoting Karen : SO WHAT?

Waakakakakkakakaakakak

I had lunch with a bunch of people I've been really close to lately. B!! ah, it's been so long since I've managed to get a hold of her to actually say a proper greeting. Busy woman she is. I'm looking forward to more lunches with her alone now that her exams are over and done with. Missing those times we shared our stories and *blush* scenes. Hahaha..

As for G, well, I don't really know her yet, but I can see that she's quite a sweet person and can be fun to hang out with. I shall be looking forward for our future lunches as this would turn into a weekly practice from now on.

The night before I called J up. I told him not to force D. It's his choice. Don't bother reminding him nor begging him. Life's not supposed to be like that. I'm glad J listened to me. But when I was at lunch, I did feel a little bit disappointed because D promised that he would not bail out this time.....

It was then D arrived. To be honest, I enjoyed his presence throughout lunch. Very friendly, very himself, very the three months ago person. How long would that last? I don't know, but I can only cherish every moment he's like that. He really made my day.

As for J, it's amazing that he's been taking notes on how I hang out with my friends. But I don't think he can catch up much with it especially money will run out like water. LOL! Good effort though, and sooner or later, things may just turn out to be better than before. I'm pleased to know that he finally understood that its not the other person to be blamed but look at yourself and make that change.

TCL, no idea much about him. But I want to know him. I hope he gives me a chance to. The other two boys who came. Well, frankly, I still can't get their names right, pardon me. But the prefect, he's been going to the library with me and J. He's such a gentleman in everything *blush* hehehehe.... the other boy.... exchanged a few sentences but more to come I hope?

I had a jolly good time even though I got carried away and forgot to eat. The aftermath was a disaster as not eating since my exams gave me a horrible horrible gastric. It wasn't the gastric that hurt as first, till my teacher made me sing with more support from my abdomen, that was .......... !@#$%

hahahaahhaha

How can I give you up, Ephraim? How can I hand you over, Israel? ........ My heart churns within Me, My sympathy is stirred... ----- Hosea 11:8


Is there any human feeling more powerful than that of betrayal? Ask a high school girl whose boyfriend has dumped her for a pretty cheerleader. Or tune your radio to a country-western station and listen to the lyrics of infidelity. Or check out the murders reported in the daily newspaper, an amazing number of which trace back to a quarrel with an estranged lover.


In the Old Testament, God through Hosea’s marriage demonstrates in living color exactly what it is like to love someone desperately and get nothing in return. Not even God, with all His power, will force a human being to love Him.

Many people think of God as an impersonal force, something akin to the law of gravity. The book of Hosea portrays almost the opposite: a God of passion and fury and tears and love. A God in mourning over Israel’s rejection of Him (11:8).


God the lover does not desire to share His bride with anyone else. Yet, amazingly, when Israel turned her back on God, He stuck with her. He was willing to suffer, in hope that someday she would return to Him.

Hosea, and later Jesus, prove that God longs not to punish but to love. In fact, He loved us so much that He sent His Son to die for us.

I believe this is something I've been trying to explain to those I've been with so much for the past three months..........and I think it's something I've accepted and learnt to appreciate God's love. I understand that love cannot be forcefully implied and the greatest challenge, is to love someone who keeps saying No, who keeps rejecting, who keeps putting you at dead end, who keeps driving you nuts, who doesn't seem to deserve your effort and care and love at all.

I pray that God will continue to give me patience and perseverance as I continue my work.

No, I'm not trying to be God, but I think this verse from the Bible made me know that I'm not entirely stupid hanging on with a bunch of lunatics. Because God made us all in His own creativity, and He must have meant something to have made us in our own ways. And I think it's about time to stop saying sorry for not doing something, but rather, start doing something and take this opportunity to serve Him even though it may seem small or not utterly important.

Everything begins from the first step. If one cannot even tolerate, work it out, strive for a dying society, then I don't think we are worthy enough to be serving at the sanctuary. Because we have made judgement before God can even judge us.

If He could've have faith in us, I don't see why we can't.

Really, stop trying to think you're just a jerk and something's wrong with you. Stop folding your arms across your chest and wait for the outcome to prove that you're correct but rather, work your ass off, hell yeah, work your ass off for Him, even if it doesn't work, your treasures are stored in Heaven. And by right, if you keep thinking about the outcome, you do not have faith in Christ.

I think it's about time I throw this question to you. Are you really concerned about the outcome, or are you concerned about your dignity and ego that may be bruised if all else fails?

I miss my brother,
Bernard,
Because I hate what I've been going through,
So much joy,
Flooded with so much pain,
Disappointments,
And too much expectations,
No, I don't mean that I can tell him everything,
But spending time with my bro can cure a whole lot of these.

I remember he told the boy who kept calling me,
For phony reasons to get a grip,
I remember he stopped many other phony idiots,
I remember how he came up with ideas to fix me and my girlfriend back,
I remember how he took me out for a ride just to cheer me up.

I stay up all the time,
Whenever I know he's coming home,
Because I'm just so tired of my life,
And I just want to be close to my brother,
He may not be there every minute every day,
At least I know he's the one I can call on,
As how I hurt today.

No matter I'm right or wrong,
He takes me into his shelter,
Regardless whether he can provide me the best,
He always does whatever he can,
I just wish I could call him today,
Because I really want to talk to him.

My head hurts so much,
I'm so tired of making everyone happy,
Only to get myself hurt,
I don't know how my world will be,
When my brother leaves even farther,
Then he already have.

I won't know who to call on,
And who to run to then,
The assurance that he's door will always be open,
Will be shut,
For a reason none of us could change,
But the fact that it's the cruelty of the world,
Who insist that we should be apart.

I'm just so upset today,
I'm just so very very upset,
I'm upset with everything and one thing,
I'm upset and I don't know what to do,
And the only person I can think of,
Is my brother.

A friendship taken on another level.

Someone you can trust thoroughly, I can no longer trust,

It's too different when that friend of yours is nothing like how he used to be,

Especially when he thinks he knows everybody when he actually don't,

And even if he says he doesn't take any sides,

But it's plain evidence that he does.

Nothing else can be done when people change,

They just ain't the same anymore,

To only save myself from more hurt and more disappointments,

He's just somebody I once knew and once confided to,

Because I don't think the old body will ever return,

So I learnt.


I was just reading my blog posts from the beginning, brought back so many memories. They'll just remain in the recycle bin. Isn't that what you want?

Supposed to go home today for vocal class at 7pm, but I got a replacement from Ian on Wednesday 6pm instead. So, I've got nothing doing in Seremban till Wednesday.

My first paper is on Wednesday!!! I'm freaking out, and so darn not prepared.

The first thing I'd want to do after I hand up my paper on Wednesday is to go home!!!!!!!!!! Miss my granny.

I worry about her most. I got Mandy to help me take a look see while I'm away. I thought J could help too but I don't think he can anymore. Sigh............

I don't know what else to do! Distance mattered. Money mattered. Granny oh granny... take care of yourself then. I'll be home soon and so sorry for not coming back tonight. She cooked my favourite yong tau foo some more.. *sobs*

Yesterday, three siblings.......me, bro and Jo, we departed from home together. That scenario was a little bit sad. It's funny, to finally realise how growned up we are now. Loading our cars with bags, the evening sunlight shone on us...... saying bye to Granny and locking the doors. Brother will always say : Take care of yourself, and behave! Drive carefully.

Jo and I would say, "bye buntut" to each other..

As we grow older, we'd want to achieve more things. We'd want to go far, but when there are times to think about stuffs, it's family that we miss most.

We got into our cars and departed separate ways. Same highway........... but different exits.

Same family................. but different places.

Especially mom who's now working in Puchong for a month. Conversations with us would be a difficulty as her work is rather demanding.

Michelle, now that she's got herself a new status in life, going through a new phase, won't be seeing much of her I guess.

Geez........ life~~~~

"What you get by reaching your destination isnot nearly as important as what you will become by reaching your destination." - Zig Ziglar

James Morrison- You make it real.

There’s so much craziness surrounding me,
There’s so much going on it gets hard to breathe
All my faith has gone you bring it back to me
You make it real for me
Well I’m not sure of my priorities
I’ve lost site of where I’m meant to be
And like holy water washing over me
You make it real for me


And I’m running to you baby
You are the only one who save me
That’s why I’ve been missing you lately
Cause you make it real for me
When my head is strong but my heart is weak
I’m full of hurricanes and uncertainty
But I can find the words
You teach my heart to speak
You make it real for me yea
And I’m running to you baby
You are the only one who save me
That’s why I’ve been missing you lately
Cause you make it real for me
Everybody’s talking in wordsI don’t understand
You got to be the only one
Who knows just who I am
And you shine in the distance
I hope I can make it through
Cause the only place
That I want to beIs right back home with you
I guess there’s so much more I have to learn
But if you’re here with me
I know which way to turn
You always give me somewhere,
Somewhere I can learn
You make it real for me


And I’m running to you baby
Cause you are the only one who save me
That’s why I’ve been missing you lately
Cause you make it real for me
You make it real for me

Karen!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm gonna knock your head for tagging me. LOL!

foine! buntut! :P

ten things people don't know about me. aites. embrace yourself.

1. i hate buying shoes cos they'll never have my size. i'm a size 9. yeah, laugh about it, i'm a big foot

2. i hate buying bras cos those sales girls would just buckle it on you out in the open. not like i mind, but i don't want you to know my size!

3. i think i have a tad of liking for that new boyfriend you guys been teasing me about. *blushes*

4. i want people to force me on stage to sing, i need that.

5. i miss someone, no he's not my boyfriend. i just e-mailed him that. well, i have been telling him that many times.

6. i want a boyfriend who is so darn in love with me, he can't live without me at all. yikes...

7. my first crush was a boy in kindergarten, we actually held hands. and i was only 6.

8. i have this wish i never told anyone before : i want to hug everyone i meet when i meet them and when i say goodbye. i didn't actually fulfill it, i don't know how to tell them.

9. i like to crack lame jokes or even embarrass myself just to make people laugh.

10. i am always too lazy to go pee.

who do i tag?

well............i'd like a lil switch. this new tag would be : Ten things you like about Charmaine.

and i tag my room mate back.......since it's a different topic now :P

Sometimes I wonder when will people understand what's privacy. As far as I'm concerned, I did mention that my blogpage is very much my journal. And it takes that bit of respect and trust to have the link to it.

Too bad, I found out that a very good friend of mine, a half Canadian, half Chinese, very good looking and very talented boy, whom I've known since standard four betrayed me. Despite the years we knew each other, our friendship could not withstand someone he called his brother.

I just wanted that bit of respect. That bit of trust, and I admired his guitar skills and supported him through many things that he likes. Though we weren't really that close, but I really thought our friendship was something till this I found out.

Rather upset indeed I am. So to speak that he is someone we all enjoy his company with. And his rockish voice when he sings. Ever so humble and never arrogant....but why?

I guess people change..

"What we think or what we know or what we believe is, in the end, of little consequence. The only consequence is what we do."

What have you done so far?

You have just sent a nudge.

maine says:
are u there?
=audrey= says:
hey
maine says:
heya
=audrey= says:
how are ya?
maine says:
going to die
maine says:
lol
maine says:
my external exams are starting on wednesday
=audrey= says:
lol...external?
maine says:
yeah cambridge papers
maine says:
not semester exams
=audrey= says:
oh...it's ok...i've got a load of stuff too...
=audrey= says:
lol
=audrey= says:
so...how have u been?
maine says:
i've been doing great
maine says:
lol
maine says:
stressful but happy
maine says:
as long as i don't fail anything or get kicked out of college
maine says:
haha kidding
maine says:
you?
=audrey= says:
thats great
=audrey= says:
i'm good...stressed out too...lol
maine says:
i noticed you online a few days ago
maine says:
just didn't have a chance to talk, my laptop's down
maine says:
my room mate sneaked out for a lil while
maine says:
so i took over hers
maine says:
=audrey= says:
oh....lol!!!
=audrey= says:
ur still staying wit her?
maine says:
my last month
=audrey= says:
hows tat goin?
maine says:
i think we finally worked things out
maine says:
cos when problems occur we could talk about it
maine says:
instead of ignoring and running away
maine says:
too bad, we ain't gonna be roomies anymore
=audrey= says:
tats great..why not?
maine says:
oh cos before we got okay
maine says:
mom already got me the kancil
maine says:
and i didnt book my next stay
=audrey= says:
ic...
=audrey= says:
so...glad things are working out well for u..
=audrey= says:
hows things wit guy?
maine says:
lol i just got off the phone with jieg
maine says:
for the first time he called me charmaine
maine says:
hahahaha
=audrey= says:
what does he usually call u?
maine says:
jieg calls me buntut cos i call him that too
maine says:
anyways, guy wasn't talking to me last time remember?
maine says:
still hoping to work things out
but pray that a friendship will work out
=audrey= says:
cool...
maine says:
missing you lar
maine says:
been hanging out with the gang quite a bit
maine says:
you're still the missing piece
=audrey= says:
yeah....miss everyone back home...
=audrey= says:
damn stress lar these days..
maine says:
exams soon or what?
=audrey= says:
alot of stuff to do..
=audrey= says:
it's crazy..
=audrey= says:
exams, assingments, thater finals
=audrey= says:
it's like never ending
maine says:
geeez
=audrey= says:
i even have a test tomorrow...
maine says:
omg.....
maine says:
and i've not even studied for my exams on wed
maine says:
i got attached with cf
maine says:
thats why 2 weeks ago i sent my laptop away and refused to go home
maine says:
to force myself to study
=audrey= says:
ur close to them is it?
maine says:
wasn't
maine says:
somehow i felt responsible for his leaving, i felt that i needed to do something
maine says:
so i came back to help them
=audrey= says:
oh...ok...
=audrey= says:
school drama
=audrey= says:
never ends
=audrey= says:
lol
maine says:
hey u made us both sound old!
maine says:
haha
=audrey= says:
hahahaha
maine says:
but its good, i mean, shaun and i came up with a camp for cf.
=audrey= says:
thats great!
=audrey= says:
=audrey= says:
have to catch up wit everyone...
maine says:
yeah you oughta!
=audrey= says:
lost track of them already...lol
=audrey= says:
hey..i gtg study now...
maine says:
alrights, keep in touch. all the best!
=audrey= says:
i'll catch up wit u soon k...make sure u get ur lap top back
=audrey= says:
thanks!
maine says:
hahaha i will end of the week
maine says:
take care
maine says:
and it ain't good without you back!
maine says:
=audrey= says:
u too...
=audrey= says:
lol...dont worry..i'll be back soon...
=audrey= says:
lol
=audrey= says:
till then...
maine says:
aites
=audrey= says:
bye
maine says:
bye

The semester's coming to an end in another month's time. Missing my room mate lil by lil.

Well........ since she started a new course, things ain't the same anymore. She's got other friends to spend time with.

And....with my crazy schedule, it's nearly impossible to hang out.

When we finally start talking, my phone will ring and I'll have to spend time talking on the phone.

I'll start studying and that's when she goes to sleep.

When she's studying, I'm sleeping.

She's in class, I'll be in the library.

Dinners are always meaningless jokes....... fun....but still........ something's missing.

She's always talking about a bunch of people I'm not familiar with, and I'm always talking about a bunch of people she's not familiar with...

We try so hard to get along with each other's friends...

Situations are looking good for now, but time's not on our side.

With me travelling and trying to get here and there in time next semester.......

With her trying to get everything done and more workloads to come in order to enter into her desired uni......

The two months' break we'd be apart and not even spend Christmas together.

The fact that she can't sleep over.

The fact that we no longer speak 4000 words in a day anymore, but should be grateful there's 1500.

Took us both a lil while to actually have time to update each other on funny stuffs and latest crushes in college.

Yes, it is rather depressing. But it's life, ain't it?

Xinyi, I just want to thank you for actually sending me the simplest yet most meaningful text message.

"Hey girl, care to join me for b'fast tomorrow before my service starts?

Xy : "care to go together?"

Awwww.... I've been waiting for that like so long!!!

And then throughout the whole day I was talking to her about what I've been doing the past three months. Okay, I know I bored you. I'm sorry. We shall seriously go shopping after my exams.

Not forgetting, she took time to actually read my blog from the very last post she read till the most recent just to catch up........and you know how much I post in one day!

But seriously, I'm really grateful that you'd join the camp just to support me and you never seem to spot any wrongs in me. Miss you lotz!!

And btw, J's not my new bf.... hahahaha, but I'll sure take you go meet the other J they teased me about. You tell me your opinion then! :P

Tonight, it was a horrible night for me really. All a sudden my plans for the Sunday went haywire and I can't seem to see myself split everywhere. I called J to tell him how stuck I was. I was pretty hurt to receive the sms........ "it's your decision, not mine, just let me know"

At that point of time, I really felt stupid. 'Cos I only am doing this because D wouldn't do it with him. So why did I have to face so many consequences? It ain't fair. And most of all, J the person whom I thought would understand despite all the ups and downs in his life that I've not failed to be absent in........gave me that cold reply.

So I said alrite, forget it. I will leave. So be it, solve it yourself. J called and texted me several times.........after much push and pull.......... I answered his call and poured out all my thoughts and hurtful opinions about him I never wanted to share. I guess I hurt him pretty badly, but he hurt me far worse.

We are okay now.........but I can no longer do anything but to only pray that D and J would someday, learn to think about other people, and run their lives like a living testimony, 'cos holding a position in the Christian way, is never easy, and it's not just for fun.

Hopefully, they'd learn to look at others before caring what's important for them, and learn to put God first despite how they really felt.

I was clearing my cupboard in my hostel. Something made me want to open that lower drawer in which I've not really used at all. Inside, I found a box filled with letters and on top, it was a photo. Those eyes yet again. That smile was so genuine. how could I have lost such love? I really want to know. I miss you. I hurt for all the pain that you've caused. But I hurt most for losing the memory of your scent, your warmth and the contours of your body. I've never found love like this where I've fought so hard for it with you, facing the world that just hate us being one. Through it all, the person who parted that grip of our hands was you. The person who lost hope and faith in our love, was you.

When September comes, I think of you the most. Rainy season i know how ill you can get. I remember how close we walked trying to keep each other dry and warm. Oh, and how you ran a little whenever I blush and say that I love you too. What would our future be.....now that we've parted separate ways? Even if for the years to come, sweetie, will you ever know that I truly love you and I was faithful and loyal? Most of all, even if I've found another, I'd still want to hear those 3 words from you again.

Soon, I won't even get the chance to catch glimpses of you no more. I wouldn't know your whereabouts. All I have of you are words and more words and just a few snapshots. But they mean the world to me. I promised a friend of ours that I would let go and I am fine. I have let go, but, keeping the sweet memories aren't always good. Because they haunt you offguard.


.........Kau terindah....masih ada,
Kau tercantik.....
Itu kamu...


It was once beautiful, but I have understood the circle of life and the ups and downs I will face. I just so happenly found a piece of you today. Well, I guess it's what they always say, First cut is the deepest.

I know that now.

T -- Tanjung rambutan mari punya

A -- Aiyoh (his fav word)

N -- Nutty Charmaine the Donkey


J -- Joker by nature

I -- Ignorant of the people around him

E -- Emo!!


G -- God will be your Guide.

U -- Ungrateful half the time

A -- Annoys Darren 98% of the time

N -- Nudity is his best policy :P

P3-04 is my room number here in campus. I have a confession to make. I have a nutheaded room mate named Karen. Wakakakakakakak



Yup, my room mate posted "CHARMAINE" on her blog after being "inspired" by my post on DARREN. So...............why not?



K -- Kayoed by her Psychology book (that's why her head's not right till now :P)



Kaboom!!!



A -- Aerodynamic sleeping position ( wakakakakakkakkaka)



R -- Ren.......same ending as Darren. Talk alike though never met, go get married lah you both!



E -- Energetic in the wee hours of the morning (what's wrong with you?! lol)



N -- Normal in the most abnormal way ( you know what i'm talking about :) )





K -- Keep.... Rolling Rolling Rolling..... with screams and laughter and giggles and chuckles

thanks to mua. :D



E -- EXTREMELY crazy!!



Z -- Zoo membership (life time one too)



I -- I love Maineypan a.k.a Charmaine (yes, yes I am aware of that)



A -- Ahhhhhhhhhhh (her reaction when it comes to Economics, well, who's to be blamed? )



H -- Hoi!! (her favourite word)





....................................................................................................................................................................



Kit Sing was upset last night, so brother, if this would cheer you up, I'm glad to be of service. :D



L -- Lame on MSN ( it's the truth, you asked for it)





I -- I think Charmaine's a very nice girl. (yes, I know that's what you always wanted to say)





M -- Melancholic mood most of the time. ( come on, put on that pinky cheeks I have)







K -- Kesejahteraan sahabat-sahabatnya is his main priority.





I --





T -- Tranquility (forever calm lah you)







S -- Singing partner





I -- Infatuated by his favourite phones. (You change more phones than I change bfs.)





N -- Never said NO to me so far





G -- Get back every weekend, will you??!!!



.......................................................................................................................................................................



Anna, I am NOT confessing my love to Darren. I love you too, don't you know that? hehehehe....



A -- Anna the BANANA



N -- No..no..no..no..no ( her fav word with her pointer finger going left and right at a quick pace)



N -- Naughty......don't fall for her innocent acts. haha



A -- Awfully annoying asking me for my link! Stop losing it!!! Hmph.





S -- Smacks everyone's ass



I -- I love Charmaine very much (why, thank you :P )



M -- Monkey business :D





C -- Constipated!





H -- Hearty meals are important to her





O -- oooooo (hahahha, everybody likes your lips in that picture doing OOOOO )





O -- OMG.... yea she no longer says Oh My Gosh, she says OMG, lazy lar you.





I -- Insane ( glad you admitted it yourself)







F -- Feature in nearly everything to do with Vincent, I don't know why. lol



E -- Entertains... hahaha



N -- Never gonna change. LOL!





Okay, you folks made an imprint on my blog too, don't be jealous lar just because Darren was posted up first. Hahahahahahaahah, I LOVE YOU peeps!!!

D -- dominating

A -- always right

R -- reliable

R -- ridiculously amusing

E -- effective words of advice

N -- negotiable.........................................(if he's in a good mood :P)


Y -- yikes (he's frequently used word)

I -- isolates himself from people who cares

P -- pervert!

W -- willing to listen

E -- endearing

I -- insufferable

R -- refuses to say yes

E -- eccentric

N -- never walked out on me so far :)


There there....now you made a mark at my blog, happy?? :P
Don't kill me. wekeekekekekek

Everytime I see you,
I get this crazy feeling inside,
But I have to let it off,
Because I am afraid,
I don't know if this would last.

If you don't know me by now,
Well, I'm not every other girl,
Once try twice shy,
It takes more than sweet nothings,
If you really want to win my heart over.

Don't ask me to give it a shot,
You don't know how it's like,
To try and fail,
That's when you need to hurt yourself,
So to feel pain,
Just to know that you're alive.

When you look at me,
What do you see?
See my broken heart,
Tell me you have the remedy to cure it,
Then I'll let you in

I adore you too,
But how do I go pass this past?
Can you love me more than he did?
Can you wipe out these awful memories I dread?
Because I know I want to love you,
If only I can break free.

Nothing but transparent,
This is how I'm feeling,
I want to learn to love again,
Is this something you'd want to strive for with me?
'Cos if it's not then, don't give me hope,
Don't leave me hanging.

You make my heart leap,
You make me clumsy,
You make me blush,
But I don't know if I'd relive that history again with you,
'Cos I'd rather we remain friends,
If we'd do end like so.

Think about it,
Think about me,
Think about us,
Before you tell me,
To be yours.

Yes, I know it's nearly similar to what Xin Yi posted last time but I just want to say that it's so very true.

I hate period!! I don't see why women have to suffer when men don't.
Worst off, men are never sensitive when you're having period.

1) I feel bloated even if I've not eaten anything
2) I get weird cravings, I'm NOT PREGNANT!
3) The truth that I AM a female. Tho, J treats me like a boy half the time.
4) I feel insecure.
5) I tire easily.
6) Burdens my budget just to buy pads.
7) I emo easily. Jie Guan, stop blaming me for emo-ing.
8) I'm abnormal, it won't go away!!!!!!!
9) I should be grateful I'm fertile? Yikes, I'm blogging this. hahahaha.
10) I hang out with the opposite sex so much I can't say, "Hey can you check if I've stained my
outfit?"

No, I'm not having PMS now, I just forgot to blog it when I had it. I'm not emo!!!!!!!!! I just can't help it, so buy me chocolates when I do, it helps :D

I hung up the phone tonight
Something happened for the first time deep inside
It was a rush, what a rush
'Cause the possibility
That you would ever feel the same way about me
It's just too much, just too much

Why do I keep running from the truth?
All I ever think about is you
You got me hypnotized, so mesmerized
And I've just got to know

Do you ever think when you're all alone
All that we can be, where this thing can go?
Am I crazy or falling in love?
Is it real or just another crush?
Do you catch a breath when I look at you?
Are you holding back like the way I do?
'Cause I'm trying and trying to walk away
But I know this crush ain't goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
Goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy

Has it ever crossed your mind
When we're hanging, spending time girl, are we just friends?
Is there more, is there more?
See it's a chance we've gotta take
'Cause I believe that we can make this into something that will last
Last forever, forever

Do you ever think when you're all alone
All that we can be, where this thing can go?
Am I crazy or falling in love?
Is it real or just another crush?
Do you catch a breath when I look at you?
Are you holding back like the way I do?
'Cause I'm trying and trying to walk away
But I know this crush ain't goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
Goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy

Why do I keep running from the truth?
All I ever think about is you
You got me hypnotized, so mesmerized
And I've just got to know

Do you ever think when you're all alone
All that we can be, where this thing can go?
Am I crazy or falling in love?
Is it real or just another crush?
Do you catch a breath when I look at you?
Are you holding back like the way I do?
'Cause I'm trying and trying to walk away
But I know this crush ain't goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
This crush ain't goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
Goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
Goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
Goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy

I went to City Park!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I................................sat on the grass.
I................................sat inside the tunnel.
I................................stood on the bridge and watched the fishies.
I................................lied on the bench and stared at the sky. I did not look anywhere else until somebody said, "Pengsan kah?" I dramatically tilt my head as tho I really pengsan... :)

I................................sat on the swing with J, till I realised it was "hanya untuk kanak-kanak dibawah umur 12 tahun sahaja"

I...............................walked from where I started to where D brought me last time. :D

I..............................wanted to purchase the kites..but it started to rain.

Yup, I really enjoyed that trip even tho certain things did not work out between me and J.

D, can you take me there sometime soon again?

The church visit to Jonathan's church was yet another something. Seriously, I didn't want to go, I was really really tired and the muscle pull I had couple of hours back that Sunday has left a toll on me. D was right that there is no need to see him since I've not gotten anything to pass to him yet, but a promise is a promise isn't it?

First, I need to know how to fix this situation. I walked in, Jon's mom hugged me for the first time, I bent to hug her but believe it or not in that split second, I fell asleep so I didn't hug her back.........she's the only one putting her arms around me...you get it? Embarrassing yet offending towards her. How now?

So happenly the worship was pretty lively and everybody danced around, as for me, I'm grateful enough I could sway.........and not fall face front. Kept my movements little. Then sermon, the moment where I bocor rahsia. Jon asked me which verse was it and I said 37....padahal it was 27. He gave me the questioning look. Okay, I'm sorry but I'm really tired! *sobs*

He told some dude next to me to keep his phone and pay attention. I was like =.="
I was text messaging D to keep awake. Shucks.
Alrights, then service was over, I got up thinking I could leave but then a few girls came up to me and Jon left me. Apa ni??!! I begin to tremble again....D, I think I still have a little bit of that fear...

They asked me about camp, college and stuff. Nice people really. :)
Then this dude announced that he wants to see all the youths after this, so I excused myself. But then Jon insisted on walking me to my car. Oookay.....well, I wanted to grab my heels in one hand and just flee to my car barefoot coz my legs are killing me. But he accompanied me so I had to wear my heels. hahhahahaha....

I am grateful he did walk me down coz there was a bunch of half naked foreigners downstairs. Bid our goodbyes and there I was, going home!!!

Sorry Karen, I forgot to pictures again, I seem to be very blurr these days... lol.

Did I mention I went home with a souvenir from...... ? :P

Sent from Heaven by Keyshia Cole... I hope it'll apply on me.....



Sent from heaven.Sent from heaven.

Now you can wait your whole life wondering
When it's gonna come or where it's been.
You may have got your heart broken
A few times in the past
Never last as strong as it used to,
It don't feel as good as it used to (before)
And all the things you used to say,
Things you used to do, went right out the door
Ooh no more, will you be the one
That's what you tell everyone around you
But you know they've heard it all before
What more can you say
When love won't let you,walk away
And you can't help who you love
And you find yourself giving it all away
When you think you're in love
Ooh cause

[CHORUS:]I wanna be the one who you believe
In your heart is sent from (sent from heaven)
There's a piece of me who leaves when you gone
Because you're sent from (sent from heaven)
I wanna be the one who you believe
In your heart is sent from (sent from heaven)
There's a piece of me who leaves when you gone
Because you're sent from (sent from heaven)

Now you can wait your whole life tryna change
What they fear from what it's been
You may have put your whole life into a man
Love aint what you thought it could've been.
Don't wanna swing your change
And you don't feel as good as you used to (before)And everything you used to say,
Everything you used to do, went right out the door
Ooh no more, will you be the one
That's what you tell everyone around you
But you know they've heard it all before
What more can you say
When love won't let you, walk away
And it can't help who it loves
And you find yourself giving it all away
When you think you're in love
Cause I wanna be hey yeah

[CHORUS]I wanna be the one who you believe
In your heart is sent from (sent from heaven)
There's a piece of me who leaves when you gone
Because you're sent from (sent from heaven)
I wanna be the one who you believe
In your heart is sent from (sent from heaven)
There's a piece of me who leaves when you gone
Because you're sent from (sent from heaven)
Everybody sayI wanna be the one you love(I wanna be)
Everybody sayI wanna be the one you trust(I wanna be)
Everybody sayI wanna be the one you need(I wanna be)
Everybody sayI wanna be the one ooh
I wanna be the one

The weekend was nothing but a hectic one.

Saturday 11th Oct 08

8.30am - Perodua (first service coz reached 1000 km)

11.00am- STM (Deaconese needed some fish)

11.15am- Wash two kancils...

1.30pm- Vaccuum-ing

2.00pm- Throw clothes in the washing machine

2.15pm- Shower!!

2.54pm- Worship practice (i was late...i'm sorry)

4.30pm- T.O.W

4.50pm- Home to pick mom up

5.10pm- Bkt Galena to pick auntie

5.30pm- City Park

6.30pm- Acasia

7.00pm- Home

8.00pm- KTM pick bro and gf

9.00pm- Dinner....swallowed in two minutes

9.15pm- CIMB bank and jo wanted to buy a phone for mom...

10.00pm- Home, study Business

10.30pm- Can't stop calling Jieg...sigh

Sunday. 12th Oct 08

3.00am - Muscle pull, cried till EVERYBODY woke up. Sorry, but it lasted for an hour.

4.00am- Refused to sleep in bed, went downstairs to sleep on the couch.

7.00am- Woke up, mom's soooo not prepared with her cooking.

8.00am- Start dressing up but I keep forgetting a lot of things.

8.30am- Finally leave home (yes, I'm late again, I'm sorry)

9.00am- Worship

10.00am- Fly to Kemayan Square

10.20am- Worship at S.O.G which lasted for an hour.....( my legs are killing me)

11.15am- Sermon ( I'm sorry Jon, I'm just too tired to pay attention)

12.30noon- Go home!!!........nope.... Jon secretly planned some getting to know you session...my contacts are killing my eyes.....

1.00pm- Go home!

2.00pm- Had communication error over and over again with Jieg

4.00pm- Study, say bye byes to bro,Amelia,sis,Winston,Auntie

5.00pm- I decided to go back to Nilai

6.00pm- Dinner with mom, I won't leave without spending time with her of course :)

7.00pm- Started my journey. Reached Labu my car screens started to get foggy..... I can't see

8.00pm-Stranded in Labu, called mom, freaked her out.

8.20pm-Wiped the screens, wind down the windows and continued my journey.

8.40pm- Arrived, my legs were wobbly.

8.50pm- Study study study

11.15pm- Sleep.

I was bored........so I took some random pictures I decided to blog about...


I was at Jieg's house last Sunday........
Sigh............kids nowadays......

Alright kiddo, you won the colouring competition.

Suruh baca buku, muncungkan bibir pulak ni..... don't pout Jieg!

He showed me the peace sign right when the waffles arrived....shucks

Well, Jim and Avin told me to jump off the cliff so I looked over.......

It's amazing how Jim is advertised as the Al Salam Wifi area...... lol

Avin, stop giving me that Vegetable is good for you story...... look at you......you didn't like the coleslaw too

Don't try to cover your acts, just admit that vege sucks.

Tadaaaa~~~ it's time to eat...........................................................BALLS!!!!!!

weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

Wait, let me savour this moment......... before I munch on them, says Jim

Well, I must say, it taste pretty good....

Eh, apa ni?

What happened to Jim?????

It's okay, I like this one better....... it's a she...........*winks*

Jim: Woo hoo.... look over there..........!!!

No no no, I'm not going to look.

Aiyer....Jim! Naughty fella...

Hhahaahahahah I'm just kidding!!!

It's all fiction really, no hard feelings! Love ya all.

Exams are just around the corner and preparing for it is just so darn draining. I don't know why I'm in such a mood where nothing else mattered and I just want to sit down and do nothing about everything. ..

I'm confused with my own feelings as well. Have I really let go of my past hurts? Am I really set free? I seem to work myself out to avoid such exhausting questions to haunt me but now that everything's falling into place, that little empty space in my mind is starting to fill up with those thoughts again.

Having crushes doesn't mean I've let go of things but at least it is a starting point of another chapter. But then again, the fear is still there and will be there till the one appears. J told me that G is treating him pretty nicely nowadays. I'm worried and I'm losing that grip I have with J. I know I have no right to judge this man who once was part of me. Yes, even for J, I'll soon have no right to say anything as well. Very very soon, just a matter of weeks. I'd like to say my service is done and accomplished but once again, I have failed to draw the line bewteen ethics and emotions.

I have allowed myself to step in too deep and now when it's time to come out and draw the curtains, I bring along a bag of mixed feelings with me and that lingering sense of worry. I kept reminding myself that I am here because of S and because of what we both thought was best to do. S reminded me repeatedly that the time has come for me to end it, it will have to end after the event, be prepared, it'll have to end......

Nothing is stopping me from letting go my work as an Ex-comm guiding them in anyway needed. But everything in me is stopping me from not caring about them that much, especially J. Time's running out for them for the event, as for me, time's running out for me to work J out and at least give me an assurance that he would not be hurt, fall, and disappointed again.

I know my presence is no longer needed and my departure mattered to them. Thus, I am slowly stepping down putting everything back into place as though I have never returned at all. I believe after the event, my presence here and now will remain faint and it would be their turn to lead the wind instead.

I don't need any recognition, I just want them to see how beautiful things can be. Sometimes its not the results that matters, it's just how you be strong for it, continue having faith and strive. As for J, he is still very insensitive, and it hurts sometimes when he doesn't know how to yet after so long being with me... but maybe it's just for the time being, I still have a lot of hope and expectations and faith in him because he's quite a tough guy.

I don't know what's next awaiting for me.... but now till the 25th November, it's still another bit of journey to pull through. Till then, it's time to start yet another new chapter for me, sometimes I wonder when would it be the last page of this book.

Happy Birthday to Azlin!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
We celebrated her birthday with our mix and match techniques at Secret Recipe.
Again, I'm sorry I was late for the whole event guys, I was caught up that Saturday with a few things.

Our dear Azlin as she happily blow the one and only candle, girl, don't you get it? You ain't no legal baby like us, you're still a baby!! hahahaah

Anna, don't worry, she's not gonna blow your skirt off.... don't need to sit back soooo back :P

I know I know.... would we let her go so easily on her birthday? I mean..... everybody's mean to everybody during birthdays... so here goes..

Anna and Mandy stirring their own recipe of POOP

Yep, and they cruelly force the birthday girl to taste it.... look at it up close

There she goes!!

We were the next few victims who had to taste the poop too.... sigh....... Avin took a picture of me but I forgot to take it... ewwww

College students....... the bottom four being victimised for no reason..

Anna Sim Chooi Fen lah dalang di sebalik batu!!

Anna: Whatt??? Where got??

Na-uh Anna, don't give us that innocent look of yours...

Anna: Vincent, I really didn't leh...... believe me.....

Think Vincent believed her??



I wouldn't know but........ check this out :

Fuhyooooooo Anna's lips..... I don't even want to elaborate what was that for... the partner next to her or....... hehehehehehe :D

Wait wait.... Vincent's saying something......

Vincent: Check that out wei!!!!!!

Check what out?

That.

Mandy dengan ganasnya wrestling with Vincent as she tries to make her stand on ''Respect women!" Jim seems to be enjoying the violence..

Is Mandy laughing or crying? I really don't know, sadly, they stopped fighting because of my camera.

Vincent decides to be innocent.... sigh, you'll never be, Vincent. What a view to be checking out at Jusco in the afternoon huh? :P


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So after the birthday celebration, we headed to this person's house whom we've not met for a very very very very long time... Who's house for Raya?

Mohd. Aqmarul whom we call "Aq" My abang angkat!!! Weeeeeeeeee, I miss you bro!

Sigh, boys, they say women gossip a lot but look at them? There's nothing but gossip....

And more food..........

Mandy pulak taking advantage of the situation to catch glimpses of her "crush"..... aiyoh Mandy fat hao pulak ni

And more food.............. Aq, if it wasn't because you're my bro, I wouldn't have touched this. It totally ruined my diet *winks*

Aiyoh, laki laki ni semua..... wanna pose also pose lah at better cars... lol!!

WAIT! I just spotted Mandy's car parked SENGET!!!!!! Pffffftttt... hehehe look at the white kancil... lol... kidding lar, not like it mattered...

Me and my bro...I love you, bro! Forever so sweet lah he, he told me to go home, pack up some clothes and stay over the weekend. Awwww!!!! Don't go back Penang lah wei, aku rindu abang angkat aku lah. HAHAHAHA

For those who don't understand:

Aqmarul and I became foster siblings since Standard 6 UPSR. It was some sort of a school ritual or something to put a few students under one teacher. Well, it wasn't the teacher that mattered in the end, it was the siblings !!! heheheehe.....


Well since we were just around the corner...... we had to go to another person's house before heading home...................


The crime scene:

Who murdered the snake?

Good old cat! What's his name? You don't wanna know....... you should ask are you sure it's a cat? Cos it's name is "Chirpie" Yikes eh?

Mandy's obssessed with it but when it comes near her, she runs ten yards away........okay a little bit of exaggeration there.

Anyways, Chirpie lost so much weight ever since somebody started college, so mean lar you woman!

What are they looking at over there??

I must admit it's quite a nice "view" of them over here.....hahahahahaah :P

So that's what they've been looking at.

I must admit that it has grown into a very disgusting or should I say......inappropriate way... hehehehe



So who's house is it?

None other than the Birthday girl -- Azlin Shahida who enjoys catfood for afternoon snacks..


Alright, we were so done with that day, energy level low. That's all for now!

Since it was Raya holidays, there weren't any classes........obviously........and we were bored....


So what to do?

Sigh..... even Su Yin is at wits end...........no no........hair end??!

Alas! Jim decides to call for a yam cha

But the human nature is such that when there's finally something on, we tend to "fong fei kei" or fly kites....

Yup, and we got Jim and Tan Wei Yew really really mad........

And then he received an sms from Maine and Mandy saying that the yam cha is back on but on a smaller scale... well Mandy, that's all we could do eh?

While waiting for us, Amelia wanted to cheer Jim up but I think .........it looks more like she wanted to cheer herself up.... *winks*

Sigh..... everybody rushed from after tuition, after classes, after shopping........ makan also no time...

Look at Mandy, I pity her lah..... she's eating like she's not been well fed for the past ten years...

Awwwwwwwww........she's shy!

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So what happened next?

Another explosion?



Nah........... but it's what they claim...........early christmas........ rather mean but I found it amusing.

Christmas tree they call it...



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Upon being mean, we noticed something else....

Boy: Sis, I have a twin!!!

Sis: Sigh, he's hallucinating again...

Boy: He's really there!!!!

Boy: Why don't you believe me??

Boy: Hey brother, can you please reveal yourself to my sisters? They don't believe me that you're my twin...

Boy 2: Okays, no probs Bro

Boy: So why are you hiding?

Boy 2: Oh nothing.........

Boy: Come on! Go meet my sisters.....

Boy: There's mommy!

Boy 2: I gotta go now......!!!

So the boy decides to get both his sisters to catch this twin of his.......

Well, to be honest, there wasn't anything funny that night, just a few pictures to remember...and yes, we were the four leng lui accompanying Jim the only man in this event.