National?

Well, today I was really not feeling well. As the hours passed my body tired even more. Thank goodness mom gave me the car today to drive back and forth to college. Take a look at my schedule today :

8.30am- Travel to Nilai
10.00am- Business class
12.00pm- Economics class
2.00pm- Travel back to Seremban
3.00pm- Lunch
4.00pm- Practice vocal
5.00pm- Change myvi to pick Michelle
6.00pm- Send catering
7.00pm- Vocal class
8.00pm- Jie Guan's church

When I attended vocal, I was half dead. Needless to say, I sounded like crap despite of my efforts to practice before class. But wait, what did he say? I couldn't be sure so he repeated it -- National Opera Competition. I was like what the ???! He spent half the time commenting negatively about my performance today in class but he said, "If you think you want to give it a shot for this competition, you still can."

It's on the 27th October he said, he went on bragging about the benefits, rm6000 cash, a chance to go on a trip with the band, and of course not forgetting, a higher chance of going over seas earlier than expected to start a CAREER. That wasn't what I wanted to hear, I wanted to hear him say, "You can do it."

However, he added that he thinks I'm not ready yet musically but vocally I'm competitive enough if I focus and discipline myself. Ah...... but when is it? October, and that is just a few days before the CF camp we've been cooking up for. And that was just two days after my AS exam first paper. Sigh....

I told J about it when I went to his church just now, he said "Good, so we don't have to see you anymore" I replied, "Is that how you truly feel? Is that what you think about me?" He was like, "No I'm not." I jokingly added, "It's probably you feeling offbalanced and a little upset about me leaving, huh?" To my surprise he admitted so.

haha.... but anyways, my answer would be a no. I can't, too many commitments at once, a chance of a lifetime? I wouldn't know. I have no idea. Let's just assume the dice has roled to my number but it just wasn't my turn to play yet.